Coffee in the News by Jessica Hodges
I read this headline in my Google News box today “Coffee doesn’t really perk you up.” Recent studies have shown that the caffeine in coffee doesn’t do anything to wake you up after awhile, it just keeps you from getting headaches. Well, that doesn’t sound like anything I haven’t heard before. Scientists at Britain’s Bristol University conducted a study which suggests some legitimacy but it still feels like old news.
Let’s see what the Onion has for “coffee news”:
Late-Working CEO Calls Out For Coffee In Vain
NEW YORK—While pulling a late-nighter at the office, Verizon Communications CEO Ivan Seidenberg repeatedly called out for coffee Tuesday despite being the only person in the building. “Would somebody please bring me some coffee?” shouted Seidenberg from his desk at approximately 11:30 p.m. “I need a cup of coffee—with two sugars. Dolores? Janice? Coffee?” Seidenberg alternated his requests for coffee with announcements that printer tray number two was out of paper. <article link>
Ghost Can’t Make A Simple Cup Of Coffee Without Everyone Freaking Out
BOUTTE, LA—Former police chief Robert J. Kensworth, whose specter still roams the top floor of the old Third Precinct station, said Monday that he is unable to make a cup of coffee without everyone freaking out. “Can’t a man make himself a cup of joe without some cleaning lady screaming her head off or some bandy-kneed recruit falling all over himself?” asked Kensworth, who was knifed to death by a convict in the third-floor hallway six years ago. “So there’s a cup and saucer floating in midair… What do they want? I’m supposed to drink out of my hands?” According to Tom Carlton, who has worked at the Third Precinct for 17 years, “old hardnosed Kensworth” loved his coffee <article link>
All sarcastic stories aside – coffee is expensive. (so are a lot of other bad habits like buying cookies and peanut butter m&ms everyday) I was watching Talk Stoop the other day and I liked the way this guy got owned for drinking Starbucks everyday.
Think of all those dollars going down the pipes, literally, and think of how many people you can help with the money you spend!!